作者shark0321 (這就是人生啊)
看板CSMU-Psy
標題[轉錄][腦殘] 幹...同學說我才是詐騙集뤠…
時間Mon Jul 3 15:56:16 2006
※ [本文轉錄自 StupidClown 看板]
※ [本文轉錄自 Hate 看板]
作者: missma (小強) 看板: Hate
標題: [腦殘] 幹...同學說我才是詐騙集團...
時間: Sat Jul 1 20:28:43 2006
前天meeting前...接到了一通沒有來電顯示的電話...
一個操著很重的大陸口音女子打來的...
女:你在幹麻?
我:你...你是那位?
女:你不記得我啦?怎麼才點小感冒你就認不出我來了...(太老套了~一聽就知道是詐騙的)
我:哦!!(驚喜狀)愛莉絲啊!!!
女:對啦~
我:最近在幹麻~~你怎麼人突然消失了?~~你花店的生意怎樣了?
女:就普普囉~是這個樣子啦...最近我有點麻煩..要現金週轉..
我:沒問題啊...大家老朋友...一句話...要借多少
女:你手邊有多少?
我:約八千萬左右...
女:(大喜...)那...可以借我個三五萬週轉嗎?
--------------此時....我老闆出現了....並大叫了一聲"大學部的來了沒有?!"-------
女:你現在在那?怎麼這麼吵?
我:我們在開會啊~你忘啦?我們總統府最近有很麻煩的事啊~
女:哦~~這樣啊...那借錢的事....(被我打斷)
我:借錢沒問題~~我們先討論一下利息怎麼付吧~
女:我們這麼熟了你還要跟我算利息呀?而且我也沒錢付利息呀~嗚(可憐貌)
我:利息還不出來就用妳的肉體來還啊!!(我冷冷的道)
女:?什麼?我沒聽清楚~你說什麼?肉體?
我:唉呀~愛麗絲你別裝啦~~我們的關係又不是一天兩天的事了~口桀..口桀..口桀
女:不要這樣咩....
我:唉呀~幹麻呀~上個月還狂野的咧~~你今天裝什麼聖女呀~口桀..口桀..口桀
女:......(沒講話)
我:不過還是不要讓克勞德知道我們的關係~~知道嗎?
女:克勞德??
我:對啊~~你那是什麼口氣啊?裝不認識啊?你知不知道你突然消失..他四處在找妳啊??
女:哦...哦...對...唉~感情的事麻~就這樣..讓人捉模不定的(幹妳在講三小..跩啥文)
女:那借錢的事...
我:嗯~借錢沒問題~~我給你二條路走~第一條是用肉體還...第二條是先把我借你的
三十萬先還我~
女:三十萬?我啥時跟你借過三十萬啦?
我:(兇惡貌)幹...你現在是怎樣?借給你錢..你現在給我裝笑ㄟ就是了?
借了你三十萬說我沒借你?那你現在要跟我借錢我怎麼敢借你??
女:我會還你啦~~你借不借我啊~~(開始不耐煩加兇惡貌)
我:幹!!!你兇殺小!!現在是你欠我錢還是我欠你錢啊!!
女:對....對不起啦~~我會還你啦~~你幫忙一下啊!
我:不然現在我們先出來飯店happy一下~表現讓我滿意我再借妳囉~口桀口桀口桀(邪淫貌)
女:別這樣麻....
我:這樣啦~~我問問克勞德看怎樣~他說要借你~
女:喂..別跟她說...
我:(把手機拿給我同學..然後跟他說..你現在是愛莉絲的男朋友克勞德)
同學A:喂...我克勞德!
女:......
同學A:你現在是怎樣!你怎麼突然消失了那麼久...你知不知道我一直在找你!
女:沒有啦..就發生了一些事..不想讓你擔心(幹你娘真會扯)
女:你可以借我嗎?五萬~~
同學A:你跟我同事文森特借了三十萬...為什麼不還他?
女:我會還啊!先借我麻~~
同學A:那你跟我借的五十萬怎麼辦?
女:(大驚)五十萬!!??
同學A:對啊~~你跟我們借的那麼多錢到底在幹麻啊?
女:就炒股票啊...被套牢了...
同學A:那你電話怎麼沒顯示...
女:不要問那麼多啦...(兇惡貌)
同學A:靠妖喔...你不講就別借啊!!
女:唉唷..給你同事聽啦~~(她指我)
我:怎麼樣?談不攏嗎?那我借你啊~~不過一天要讓我HAPPY一次直到還清哦~口桀口桀口桀
女:你們這些人怎麼都這樣啦!!!?
----------------此時...老闆已經在跟專題生meeting..老闆講話非常大聲-------
我:好吧~~你乾哥Jordan也在這裡~~我問他看看借不借
女:喂....
同學B:妳誰啊!!!
女:我愛莉絲啦....
同學B:剛他們兩個沒跟你說我們在開會嗎?現在陳水扁很火大~你沒聽他講話這麼大聲嗎?
女:那你借我錢啊~~我真的走投無路了!!
同學B:那你欠我的八十萬呢?
女:.........(掛電話)
------------------------------------------------------------------
戲弄詐騙集團好像變成我的樂趣了....
--
※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc)
◆ From: 218.172.52.172
※ 編輯: missma 來自: 218.172.52.172 (07/01 20:30)
1F：推 FaXin:幹 超好笑XD 能不能借轉 07/01 20:30
2F：推 nobrain5566:XD 07/01 20:30
3F：推 RAIGON:推 07/01 20:31
4F：推 pili70076:讚 07/01 20:31
5F：推 linesa:XDDDDD 07/01 20:31
6F：推 rebaw:XD 07/01 20:32
7F：推 qaz2004:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 20:32
8F：→ qaz2004:我轉囉 07/01 20:32
--
◢ _▃_ 老婆，我回來了！還買了禮物要.... ╔═════════════╗
█ 囧 老婆，我回來了！還買了禮物要....
║ ║
] /■\ 老婆，我回來了！還買了禮物要.... ║ 門的另一端，世界的真實。 ║
█ || ︵︵ β 妳技術不錯嘛! ○ ║ ║
◤◥◣◥◣ (|\ 唔..好棒 ║【真實之門】 gayb/cAshoNly║
◥██◣ /`○rz ╚═════════════╝
--
※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc)
◆ From: 61.223.207.160
9F：→ embezzle:推XD 07/01 20:34
10F：推 l1l1l1l1:XDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 20:42
11F：推 new1025:XDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 20:45
12F：推 erilinda:XDDDDDDDDD 07/01 20:46
13F：推 firestarbtb:我笑了 07/01 20:47
14F：推 leader9791:一定要推的啊!! 07/01 20:53
15F：推 HornyDragon:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 20:57
16F：推 UchihaItachi:不然現在我們先出來飯店happy一下....口桀口桀口桀 07/01 21:03
17F：推 godofxbox:XDXDXDXDXDXDXD 07/01 21:04
18F：推 loveyanzi03:精采的故事阿!!!! 07/01 21:07
19F：推 summerRang:大笑翻跟斗 07/01 21:12
20F：推 astinsalt:口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀 07/01 21:12
21F：推 Markubase:老闆 : 我是陳水扁，你欠我的SOGO禮券勒?? 07/01 21:22
22F：推 weakman:口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口 07/01 21:23
23F：推 ZGY:口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀...朕還要二十萬 07/01 21:26
24F：推 freesamael:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 21:27
25F：推 green1108:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD太好笑啦 07/01 21:28
26F：推 skylikewater:XDDDDDDD 本日最XD 07/01 21:32
27F：推 minbyminby:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 21:35
28F：推 carlos0711:很白痴欸 還套上太7的人名 07/01 21:37
29F：推 HOTONY:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 21:37
30F：推 TinyaX:哈哈哈XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 21:40
31F：推 arra:超好笑XDDDD 07/01 21:40
32F：推 dodonpachi:陳水扁... 07/01 21:41
33F：推 seanken:XD 07/01 21:42
34F：推 smaljohn:XD 07/01 21:47
35F：推 scisyhp:XDDDDDDDD 07/01 21:57
36F：推 jeffasdog:唬功一流...XD 07/01 21:59
37F：推 yao30712:XD 07/01 22:04
38F：推 MixCopy:XXDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 22:05
39F：推 glion:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 22:07
40F：推 jakelee:先出來happy一下～ 07/01 22:10
41F：推 MLByo:邊看邊笑~~~~~~~~~XDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 22:15
42F：推 xGOTOx: 先出來happy一下XDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 22:15
43F：推 dangerousman:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 22:18
44F：推 DoggieDoggie:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 22:19
45F：推 yellow0216:哈哈 07/01 22:24
46F：推 pqpq921:好好笑喔XDDDDDDDD 07/01 22:28
47F：推 evisu0915:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 22:31
48F：推 x31216:口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口 07/01 22:41
49F：推 crazybilly:推!我愛麗絲啦~~~ 07/01 22:42
50F：推 xxxEVA:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 22:44
51F：推 kevinfu619:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 22:48
52F：推 icome:簡值比詐騙集團還厲害 =.= 07/01 22:49
53F：推 sportsyzm:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 22:51
--
※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc)
◆ From: 211.22.52.220
54F：推 happycoser:XD 07/01 22:54
55F：推 emily10231:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 22:57
56F：推 l89:我笑到肚子快要痛死了 07/01 22:59
57F：推 boggylin:XDDDDDDDD好幾八.. 07/01 23:00
58F：推 leoellen:XD 很好笑 不過不笨阿@@ 很聰明捏 07/01 23:03
59F：推 huangg:笨的是詐騙集團@@~ 07/01 23:04
60F：推 Trovaldsa:原PO是ff迷啊 XXD 我笑了 07/01 23:07
61F：推 youcankillme:(笑到在地上打滾) 07/01 23:10
62F：推 coffeewhite:原PO是強者XDDDDDD 07/01 23:11
63F：推 blast23:原PO可以改行去當詐騙集團了XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 23:12
64F：推 cheerbc:XDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 23:16
65F：推 cosy:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 23:17
66F：推 vul3co:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 23:21
67F：推 braveht:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 23:25
68F：推 tinarose:推啦 屌到爆了 07/01 23:27
69F：推 cherry313:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 23:29
70F：推 PaPaSoft:叫他小心一點，塞菲羅斯最近要砍她 07/01 23:29
71F：推 QWERTY181:推越欠越多 哈哈哈 XDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 23:33
72F：推 Simakui:笑死我了 超機車 07/01 23:35
73F：推 aurorazeng:跟上次harry potter的有的比咧XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 23:37
74F：推 kellychi:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 23:39
※ fistfight:轉錄至看板 NTUE_Nse96 07/01 23:44
75F：推 minbyminby:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 23:46
76F：推 huskyjin:超好笑的啦!!口桀口桀 07/01 23:47
77F：推 kisun:快笑死我了，這招我要學下來，XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/01 23:49
78F：推 adiday:...怎麼覺得劇情很誇張= = 07/01 23:52
79F：推 mimicolin:跟樓上同感說… 07/01 23:56
80F：推 kajer:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 00:01
81F：推 chinzu:XDDDDD 07/02 00:02
82F：推 clhd:口桀口桀口桀~~~ 07/02 00:03
83F：推 wyc:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 00:04
84F：推 chrisydvin:哈哈哈哈 FF7是吧~~XD 07/02 00:07
85F：推 Kenqr:你才是詐騙集團！<(￣▽￣)@m 07/02 00:10
86F：推 GOFORYOU:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 00:11
87F：推 swama07:屌! 07/02 00:13
88F：推 abilitys:這個好笑..酷 07/02 00:20
89F：推 Magnoliaceae:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 00:23
90F：推 tachikom:水啦XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 00:52
91F：推 catgirl:XDDDDDDD我不爭氣的流淚了 07/02 00:55
92F：推 lskd:哈哈哈 我大笑 推 XD 07/02 00:57
93F：推 uzumaki:XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXD 07/02 00:57
94F：推 kingkevin34:你有天份 07/02 01:11
95F：推 bluestear:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 01:14
96F：推 ariaqua:雖然很好笑沒錯，但總覺得誇張過頭不像真的 ^^;;; 07/02 01:21
97F：推 proletariat:哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈 07/02 01:24
98F：推 MPLeo:XDDDDD好狠喔 07/02 01:41
※ shaoan:轉錄至看板 TA_AN 07/02 01:55
99F：推 StAKA:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 01:59
100F：推 bajiqa:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 02:05
101F：推 guithawk:那怎麼沒有塞菲羅斯？ 口桀口桀口桀 07/02 02:40
102F：推 trtc:現在陳水扁很火大~你沒聽他講話這麼大聲嗎?XDDDDDD 07/02 02:46
103F：推 Faoitohins:XDDDDDDDD推倒詐騙集團先 07/02 03:30
104F：推 Leson:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDdd 07/02 03:52
105F：推 shuntpooh:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 04:56
106F：推 ziiwewe:夠好笑XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 09:40
107F：推 loveshih:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 10:07
108F：推 doghenry:推 現在陳水扁很火大~你沒聽他講話這麼大聲嗎?XD 07/02 10:46
109F：推 jinshing:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD好好笑 07/02 10:46
110F：推 wangsynnex:我的媽啊 好歡樂 07/02 11:04
111F：推 juliey566:太厲害了,要學起來 07/02 11:16
112F：推 Jube:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 11:44
113F：推 jjjamie:口桀口桀口桀 07/02 11:46
114F：推 cattie:愛莉絲: 詐騙集團也是人啊~~~(淚奔) 07/02 11:49
115F：推 jasmine271:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 11:51
116F：推 onlylikeu:XDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 11:58
117F：推 alan2000:屌!! 07/02 12:25
118F：推 mezad:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 12:53
119F：推 maytime:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 13:01
120F：推 aneyoko:繼續下去的話塞菲羅斯一定會出場的XD 07/02 13:01
121F：推 elmush:太歡樂了啦！XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 13:22
122F：推 domotoyukali:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 13:40
123F：推 chicobo:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD不推不行 07/02 14:14
124F：推 dandelion75:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 14:23
125F：推 goodnester:鄉民們!!推爆的時間來了!!大家來集氣吧!!!XDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 15:00
126F：推 powerki:太好笑了XDDDDDDDD 07/02 15:04
127F：推 mker:XD 07/02 15:39
128F：推 trustmyself:太讚了啦 XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 16:40
129F：推 jhan:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 活該 詐騙集團去死 07/02 16:51
130F：推 asami:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 17:19
131F：推 iamzen:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 這個超HIGH的 07/02 17:29
※ koham:轉錄至看板 bad_boyz 07/02 18:22
※ koham:轉錄至看板 bad_boyz 07/02 18:22
132F：推 ffwind:....................XDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 19:12
133F：推 gLid3:不推雞雞會爛掉 07/02 19:28
134F：推 t5826019:XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 19:40
135F：推 cinlia:超好笑XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 20:18
136F：推 neko303:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 20:34
137F：推 kotomi:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD我要塞菲羅斯啦XDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 21:01
138F：推 ahbo:現在陳水扁很火大~你沒聽他講話這麼大聲嗎?XDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 21:06
139F：推 coldshawn:CFFFFFFFFFFF 07/02 21:08
140F：推 anglerfish:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 21:18
141F：推 plumg:樓上......... 07/02 21:22
142F：→ plumg:樓樓上 07/02 21:22
143F：推 zo4:還不錯用........ 07/02 22:04
144F：推 bchfut:豪好笑XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/02 23:14
145F：推 moonycat1:XDDDDDDD 07/02 23:31
※ Hatred:轉錄至看板 Yup00-04 07/02 23:39
146F：推 ewolf:真想知道如果約出來會怎樣...XDDDDDD 07/03 00:11
147F：→ missma:約出來後..隔天新聞:詐騙集團慘糟PTT網友騙財騙色 07/03 00:24
148F：推 boltsky:XDDDDD 07/03 00:28
149F：推 woodymonkey:真是太強了啦！哈哈~~ 07/03 00:52
150F：推 Jerr:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD滿分! 07/03 02:13
151F：推 Fourfish:太好笑了！！XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/03 02:29
152F：推 copysort:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/03 03:49
153F：推 madnessjason:我也想學XDXD 07/03 06:34
154F：推 homebest:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 07/03 10:55
155F：推 taltal:席飛斯(狼板):幹..我哪時候變陳水扁了.還有我的100萬記得還 07/03 11:04
156F：推 princessmake:XD 07/03 11:20
157F：推 bake088:口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口桀口 07/03 11:35
158F：推 solfeges:哈哈哈 太好笑了 07/03 12:30
159F：推 ptttp:XD 07/03 13:27
160F：推 maokid:超好笑的啦~~~~ 哈 07/03 14:04
161F：推 chaosspace:快爆了嗎 下一個報吧 07/03 14:09
162F：推 noio:爆 07/03 14:09
163F：推 dos:該m XD 07/03 14:55
164F：推 lucas01:XDD FF7 07/03 14:55
165F：推 henhe:XDDDDDDDDDDD邊看邊笑！ 07/03 14:57
※ agiou:轉錄至看板 HSNU_1005 07/03 15:39
166F：推 shark0321:借轉XD 07/03 15:55
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※ 編輯: shark0321 來自: 61.229.210.13 (07/03 15:57)