作者dvlin (Dee)
看板ST-English
标题Re: [写作班] 托福第六周 JennyQ-2
时间Wed Mar 26 08:33:20 2008
※ 引述《jennyQ (天天天天天天天天天天兵)》之铭言:
: 2. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People should
: sometimes do things that they do not enjoy doing. Use specific
: reasons and examples to support your answer.
: I disagree that people should sometimes do things that they do not
: enjoy doing. Doing things against one's will is annoying, repugnant,
: and even torturous.
: Sometimes we may have to do things we don't want to do. What I want
: to state is that we should change our mind, attitude, and more clearly,
: emotion toward the motivation of what we do. People study hard for
: knowledge, and knowledge is for improving human life. People work
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
*I think it's better to use a more active tone (like the next sentence),
and say that "knowledge helps us improve human lives."
: day-and-night for living, and various industries provide us all we need.
^a
: Neither studying nor working is an easy thing. People struggle for
: freedom, for democracy, and for human rights. There are absolutely far
: more difficult things, through the processes they may get hurt, or even
^of which
: die. However, they fought to the last second even if they were bleeding.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Present tense -> past tense?
*There are 2 things you can do here,
(1) use the present tense from here to the end of the paragraph, if you
want to write more generally; or
(2) add a sentence indicating that you're now talking about certain people
in history who have made sacrifices, etc. (It would be even better if
you gave examples, too.)
: The inteinsion of leading a better life made them firmly believe they
intention
: should do those torturous fightings.
: Knowing what is the most important goal should be achieved and
xx
*verb after noun here: ^^^^^^^^^
: learning having a positive attitude to it is the way how we do
to have xxxxx ^^^^^^^^^^^
*redundant;
keep either "the way"
or "how"
: dislikeful things without complaints.
dislikable
*
*To be dislikeful means to be full of dislike, i.e. to dislike many things.
: It is just like daily triffles we can not ignore purposely.
trifles
: As long as we are determined and believe finally we will succeed,
^^^^^^^
it might be better to use (that + ) "eventually" or "in the end"
: there is nothing we can not do it with joy.
xx
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1F:推 jennyQ:haven't say thank u. ^^ Danke!!!!! 03/27 07:38
2F:→ dvlin:Bitte. 03/27 08:26
3F:推 jennyQ:haven't said..@@ 03/27 09:36