有几个疑问想请大家帮忙... (总共有八个问题。) 1. (前文提到，现代父母对於到底该不该叫孩子做家事，感到犹豫不决， 而这种态度源自多种深层的原因，其中之一便是时间压力。) The sources of our ambivalence about chores are varied and deep. Some of the mixed feelings come from simple time pressure. I once spoke at a school where the paretns, only slightly exaggerating, told me that their children had so much homework each night that they had to start in immmediately after arriving home from school. The mothers served the children dinner on a tray so they could keep working while they ate. The children worked until late in the evening. < Before bed the mothers would dip the children in the bathtub >, slip them into their pajamas, and tell them to hurry and get to sleep so that they would be rested for school the next day. In the morning they would wake the sleepy little children and help them get dressed. No time for everyday chores for these young scholars. 请问，这里的 dip 有夸饰的成分吗？(好像浸一下就提起来那种感觉) 还是纯粹是叙述让小孩很短暂的泡一下澡就起来呢？ 2. (前文提到，有些爸妈不想叫孩子做家事的心态其实比较不健康， 他们因为觉得寂寞或没有安全感，因此一直唠叨孩子， 希望能用这样子的方式跟孩子继续保持紧密的关系。) Paradoxically, effective parenting can cause parental separation anxiety. If we really expect and demand that children take responsibility, we may no longer need to nag them. But if we are suffering from a sense of loneliness in marriage or feelings of insecurity in our fragmented world, we may unconsciously seek the involvement and intimate connection with our children that nagging and reminding bring. And there's yet another hidden advantage to having irresponsible children-- < if we keep them dependent on us we won't have to face our own mortality >. We'll always be a helpless someone's mommy or daddy. 请问，这里的 our own mortality 应单纯是 "自己的生命终将殒灭"， 还是应该引申为 "孩子终有一天不再需要我们" 呢？ (虽然 mortality 的各种字义里似乎并没有第二种意思...) 3. 前文提到，现代的家长把小孩保护得太好，导致他们欠缺生活能力； 有位美术老师说自己在带小二生用纸浆做雕塑时： The children need to pour water from a large pitcher into a bowl. None of the kids volunteered to do the pouring. "Do you guys know how to pour?" Have you ever done it before?" I asked. It turned out that none of them had! It's so modern. They can't pour, but I'll bet they all knew how to load software on the computer by the time they were in kindergarten. 请问，这里的 it's so modern 是指 "这真的是只有在这个时代才会发生的事" 吗？ 4. 前文提到，现代家长虽然会找很多理由让孩子不用做家事 (譬如他们课业很重，我自己做比较快等等)， 但其实他们内心也知道做家事对孩子是有好处的。 Once you are convinced of the genuine value of household chores, you can shed your guilt and ambivalence and assign table-clearing and pot-washing duties confidently. In our hearts, of course, we know that chores are good for us. I recall a conversation in one of my parenting classes that brought to light < just how hungry mothers are for meaningful chores to give their kids >. 这句我我总觉得看起来文法怪怪的... 有人可以告诉我类似的例句吗？ o_O 请问这是是 "母亲有多麽渴望让孩子做有意义的家事" 吗？ 为什麽不讲 how hungry mothers are to give their kids meaningful chores 呢？ (还是说...这样讲不对？) 5. 作者解释该如何选择让孩子做哪些家事。 When it comes to assigning tasks, a major stumbling block for parents is lack of basic knowledge about which chores should begin when. Because we don't live with an extended family of seasoned parents to provide child-rearing advice, we may be unsure about what is appropriate to expect from our children. And because the world is changing so quickly, the old rules may not apply. You can't send a six-year-old to the market by herself to pick up some bread and milk anymore, but you can teach her how to sweep the kitchen floor, and put away her clean clothes. Children learn responsibility in phases. The important thing is that your child continue to add more tasks as the years go by. In general, children start with self-care, which includes toileting [...] (接下来举各种例子，包括四岁可以自己洗手、刷牙，浇花、擦桌子， 五岁可以收玩具，整理床铺，把脏衣服放进洗衣篮， 再大一点的孩子可以帮忙摆碗筷、收碗筷等等。) The next stage is care for the family and the household. Here your child contributes to the smooth running of the ship by helping to set and clear the table, bandaging a sister's skinned knee. Older children and teenagers graduate to cooking, washing the car, and earning their own spending money. < The family is the little laboratory for what Judaism sees as the most mature stage of responsibility, where we treat our community as family, give charity, and provide service to others. > 请问，这里的 mature stage 是什麽意思？ 理解为成熟的时期/阶段似乎不对， 如果试着把 stage 解释为舞台之类的意思.. 好像还是不对... 6. 前文提到，有些孩子脾气较拗执、难以管教， 而该惩罚的时候虽然还是要惩罚，但是手段应该温和。 In Jewish philosophy, there are two basic views about how to motivate children to take responsibility. One is that chronic noncompliance requires strong discipline. It is said that Rabbi Joshua told his students, "The child may be compared to a heifer -- if he is not taught to plow when young, it will be difficult for him to do so in the end; or to a wine branch -- if you do not bend it when it is full of sap, once it hardens, you can do nothing with it." How do we teach and bend? In Proverbs we read several versions of "spare the rod and spoil the child": "For he whom God lovs God admonishes", and "Correct your child and he well provide you rest". But Torah teaches us to administer discipline with a light hand. The weight of Jewish tradition forbids humiliating, threatening, or physically harming a child and advises us to follow the example of God, who never punishes without previous warning and without telling the transgressor what to expect if he continues to misbehave. 请问，这里的 weight 是甚麽意思呢？我查遍字典都查不出符合的意思.. *Torah是犹太律法书，内容是犹太人为人处事的守则。 7. 前文提到，有个妈妈让孩子逐步参与家务， 包括把自己的书包、外套挂好，收拾碗筷等等。 但是这个孩子老是忘记吃完晚饭要收碗筷，不管怎麽提醒、怎麽威胁利诱都没用。 後来妈妈改成只要孩子把刀叉收到水槽冲一冲、再放到洗碗机里就好。 This job appealed to Sara because of its start-to-finish nature, and she did without being reminded. 这里的 start-to-finish 同样是我怎麽查都查不出来符合的意思... 请问该怎麽解释呢？ 8. 作者表示，有数种方法能让孩子养成做家事的习惯， 其中一个是 give them what they need: Parents need to make sure that children are given whatever they need to perform their job, such as a carpet sweeper for a child who isn't yet ready for a vaccum. Also match your expectations with the moment. Most children are a "mixed multitude" all by themselves and you'll find them helpful and responsible one day or week and great sluggards the next. (这里的 mixed multitude 是取自圣经。 这个词原本是用来形容 摩西领着渡过红海、抵达应许之地的全部子民， 而这群人是由埃及社会里不同阶层的人民组成的，彼此的身世背景差异很大。) 请问，这里的 all by themselves 是什麽意思呢？ 我只查得到 "靠自己" 和 "单独" 两种意思.. 非常感谢！！ --

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