我以性感卡塞尔的长相发誓，请求各位严肃看待这篇报导，我要求球团正视KG的心魔问题， 这是个在季後赛前几论就已经出现的问题，当总冠军对湖人无法拿下两场客场胜利的时候， 我强烈怀疑这个问题到现在还没被解决，难怪KG会心神不宁陷入犯规麻烦，连罚球也不进。 再次强烈要求！河流和球团请拿出诚意解决。 http://myurl.com.tw/buf0 ------------------------------ Celtics attribute recent road woes to absence of Garnett nightlight, lucky blanket KG的小夜灯与幸运小毛毯 BOSTON, MA — Boston Celtics head coach Doc Rivers has remained mum on the reason for his team’s highly suspect play on the road in the first two rounds of the NBA Playoffs – that is, until now. 河流教练为了超赛季後赛连续两轮的客场歼没做出说明。 One day after the Celtics dispatched LeBron James and his Cleveland Cavaliers in Game 7 of the Eastern Conference Semifinals, Rivers confessed to a stunned throng of reporters at an impromptu Monday night press conference that star forward Kevin Garnett is actually to blame for Boston’s six consecutive losses away from home. 在超赛第七场淘汰LBJ和骑士队的当天，河流向媒体公开放话说「KG必须要为超赛的连续六 场的客场失利负责」。 “Kevin hasn’t had his Hannah Montana nightlight and matching commemorative blanket – or as he likes to call it, his ‘lucky blankie’ – since we finished up the regular season’s last road trip,” Rivers explained. “We think he must have misplaced them in his hotel room in Portland, but they didn’ t have them at the lost and found. Either way, he absolutely refuses to buy new ones.” 「自从我们结束了例行赛的最後一个客场之旅後，凯文就再没能拥有他的Hannah Montana 小夜灯，也没能找到足以代替他那条纪念性价值毛毯的替代品——他喜欢称它为他的 『幸运小毛毯』。」河流这麽解释：「我们认为凯文必定是在波特兰的旅馆房间把这些东 东西搞丢了，可是在失物招领中心并没有它们的踪影。而这两件东西中的任意一件他都 拒绝再买新的。」 Though he realizes some skeptics will laugh at his reasoning, or call him an excuse-maker, Rivers says he has spent a lot of time thinking about the issue. He sees no other cause to which he can attribute his team’s road struggles against Atlanta and Cleveland. 尽管河流明白一些怀疑论者会嘲笑这一个理由，或者认为是藉口罢了，但河流仍然表示他真 的花了许多时间在思考这个问题，但是就是找不到超赛爲什麽在对老鹰与骑士的系列赛客场 输球的原因。 “Our team won over thirty games on the road during the regular season, and we’ re beginning to think it was due to KG’s nightlight and blanket, not our clamping, stifling defense,” the former coach of the year said. “We’ve been playing even better defense in the playoffs, but Garnett hasn’t had his Hannah Montana stuff – you do the math. It’s one of those crazy things you just can’ t explain.” 「我们的球队在例行赛赢得超过30场的客场比赛，所以我们开始认为这都是因为KG的小夜灯 和小毛毯的缘故，而不是因为我们的防守出了问题。」河流说道：「我们在季後赛一直无法 拥有更出色的防守表现，但是KG没有了他的Hannah Montana系列周边产品──你算算，这就 是众多无法解释的疯狂事件之一。」 According to Rivers, the Celtics’ first order of business before leaving Boston for Game 3 of the conference finals will be ensuring that their 11-time All-Star is comfortable with the idea of being away from home, which may ultimately mean diverting the team plane for a layover – and desperate search of the Marriott Hotel – in Portland on the way to Detroit. 根据河流所言，超赛为了能让KG安心打球，在离开波士顿远赴底特律的东区决赛第三场前， 他们也许会改变球队的航程──转飞波特兰，尽全力在Marriott Hotel展开疯狂寻找。 “I thought about going to Hannah Montana’s website and ordering that stubborn son-of-a-bitch some autographed replacements, just to calm his nerves,” Rivers told SSNN. “But I just don’t think there’s any way he would go for it. He likes his ‘blankie’ with the frayed edges and the mysterious stains on it, and I probably can’t replicate them closely enough to fool him. So it wouldn’ t do any good, and I would be out $500.” 「我有想过去Hannah Montana的网站订购一些有着该死签名的其他产品以稳定他的神经。」 河流继续说道：「但是我不认为他会接受，哪怕有一点点不同，他只喜欢他那条破破烂烂 、还有神秘污渍在上头的小毛毯，而我根本不可能把它复制到以假乱真的地步来骗他，所以 这个方法完全没有效用，我还白花美金五百元。」 But if all else fails, Rivers believes his team is still confident and talented enough to overcome Garnett’s handicap and make a run at a title. “Thank God we ’re the first seed and have home-court advantage. We could go winless on the road the entire playoffs and still win it all. As long as Paul Pierce gets his pre-game meal of pig uterus and horse penis, we’ll be okay.” 尽管如此，河流对他的球队还是自信满满，他们的能力可以克服KG的诸多不利因，并且一 路闯进总冠军，感谢上天 我们是第一种一子拥有主场优势，即使我们在整个季後赛客场一 场也不胜，我们仍然会赢得最终的胜利，只要PP在赛前有吃到猪的子宫和马的「那个」。 (→谁可以告诉我最後一句怎麽翻译呀 我懂原文的意思 有够毒 XD 但要怎麽表达呀 囧 ) Posted on May 20th, 2008 --------------------------------- 很好，看来PP回到LA的家，晚餐应该吃的很彭派，今天表现完全切入魂，继续吃下去吧， 回到波士顿，叫你老婆煮给你吃 囧 ，拜托多吃一点，下一场就封王！ 至於KG，一人一毯救KG???? 囧囧囧 超赛加油，主场封王！ # --

※ 发信站: 批踢踢实业坊(ptt.cc) ◆ From: 61.230.93.120 ※ 编辑: SexyCassell 来自: 61.230.93.120 (06/16 16:55) ※ jasonflower:转录至看板 ck_17_301 06/16 17:06 ※ jasonflower:转录至某隐形看板 06/16 22:39