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Part-03 [Scene: The Hallway, Chandler is trying to get Janice out of his apartment.] Janice: Oh, I miss you already. Can you believe this happened? Chandler: No... no! And yet it did. Good-bye, Janice. Janice: Kiss me! (Janice kisses him. Monica comes out for the newspaper.} Monica: Oh, Chandler, sorry. (Janice turns around, Monica sees who it is.) Monica: Ohhh, Chandler, sorry! Hey, Janice. Janice: Hi, Monica. Chandler: Ok, well, this was very special. Monica: Rach, come see who's out here! (Rachel comes out.) Rachel: Oh my god. Janice, hi! Chandler: Janice is gonna go away now. Monica: I'll be right back. (Joey enters from the stairs.) Rachel: Oh, Joey, look who it is. Joey: (in disbelief) Whoa. Chandler: Oh, good, Joey's home now. Janice: This is so fun. This is like a reunion in the hall. (Monica comes out with her cordless phone.) Monica: Oh, hi, Ross. Yeah. There's someone I want you to say hi to. (to Chandler) He just happened to call. Janice: Hi, Ross. Yes, it's me. How did you know? (she laughs obnoxiously) [Scene: A Chinese Restaurant, Ross is there with his date.] Ross: I'm just sayin' if dogs do experience jet lag, then, because of the whole um, seven dog years to one human year thing, then, when a dog flies from New York to Los Angeles, he doesn't just lose three hours, he loses like a week and a half. (Ross starts to laugh, and then makes a face like 'Why did I just say that?' Ross' ex-wife, Carol, and her lesbian lover, Susan, enter the restaurant. Ross stares at them.) Kristin: That's funny. Who are they? Ross: The blond woman is my ex-wife, and the woman touching her is her... close, personal friend. Kristin: You mean they're lovers. Ross: If you wanna put a label on it. Kristin: Wow, uh, anything else I should know? Ross: Nope, nope, that's it. (Carol takes off her jacket, her pregnant belly is exposed.) Ross: Oh, and she's pregnant with my baby. I always forget that part. (to Carol and Susan) Helloo! [Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the girls are holding their boyfriend bonfire.] Phoebe: Ok, so now we need, um sage branches and the sacramental wine. Monica: All I have is, is oregano and a Fresca. Phoebe: Um, that's ok! (throws it in fire) Ok. All right. Now we need the semen of a righteous man. Rachel: Ok, Pheebs, you know what, if we had that, we wouldn't be doing the ritual in the first place. Monica: Can we just start throwing things in? Phoebe: Ok, yeah, ok. (she throws the directions in) Oh, OK. Rachel: (tossing things in the fire) Ok, Barry's letters. Adam Ritter's boxer shorts. Phoebe: Ok, and I have the, uh receipt for my dinner with Nokululu Oon Ah Ah. Monica: Look, here's a picture of Scotty Jared naked. Rachel: (looking at picture) Hey he's wearing a sweater. Monica: No. Rachel and Phoebe: Eww! Rachel: And here we have the last of Paulo's grappa. Monica: Hey, Rachel, isn't that stuff almost pure... (Rachel throws the alcohol in the fire. A burst of flames shoots up from it.) [Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Joey are there. Chandler is preparing to dump Janice again.] Chandler: How can I dump this woman on Valentine's day? Joey: I don't know. You dumped her on New Year's. Chandler: Oh, man. In my next life, I'm coming back as a toilet brush. (Janice enters.) Janice: Hello, funny Valentine. Chandler: Hi, Just Janice. Janice: Hello, Joey, our little matchmaker. I could just kiss you all over, and I'm gonna! (Janice kisses Joey all over. Chandler smiles.) Joey: (to Chandler) If you don't do it, I will. --



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