大學之前我寫的大部份都是中文詩 上大學之後才開始用英文創作 Loyal Doyal's Angel是我的第一個較長篇的創作(敘事詩) 可否請各位前輩指點一下 :> <: 我真的寫不出什麼意境 我只會押韻 （裡面有一部分來自Hero and Leander） 獻醜了 In the river was the good swimmer, Angel, He was on his way to see his love, beautiful Doyal. The way they seeing each other was difficult, Since their parents wanted to make their effort no result. In the water cold, Angel recalled the days of old. It was at and about the Christmas tide, While Angel saw Doyal right the church inside. At the first sight, Angel already made sure that Doyal was the Lady Right. After Angel's confession, Doyal's heart was full of struggle and confusion. "But I'm a nun," Said Doyal, "it is impossible to announce our love under the sun." "Is it important that everyone knows that we are in love?" Replied Angel when he was feeding a dove. They both make up their mind That they'd try the love thing like the all mankind. Their date was secret, 'Cos they could only meet each other after sunset. Every night, Angel swam across a dangerous river merely for a sight. To the place Where Doyal lived with grace. Doyal held a torch of fire as guide. Leading Angel came to her side. But one night, forever change, Like someone might lose his fame due to a forge. While Angel was in the river, a sudden wind came, Directly to the torch held by Doyal as the old same. The fire was extinguished, so did the heart of Doyal and Angel, perished. Angel was lost in the river, And no one did saw him ever. Waited for her love until the sun rose, Doyal kept the same still pose. But no one showed up. As sad sa she could, Doyal rushed back to the church as she should. Locked the door, And speak no more. Her love died for her, Now Doyal wanted returned to the Sir. An hour later, When the priest came to look for her, Finding the door locked, He peeked through the wall's crack: Although the barrier of two was only a door, Their distance was more than a mile. Leaving behind, a world laughs no more, Since the fair lady looked lifeless in the profile. --

※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc) ◆ From: 59.126.175.131