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[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is eating breakfast, Joey quietly opens his bedroom door.] Chandler: Hey, big... Joey: Shhhh! Chandler: (quietly) ...spender. Joey: She's still asleep. Chandler: So how'd it go? Joey: Oh, it was amazing. You know how you always think you're great in bed? Chandler: The fact that you'd even ask that question shows how little you know me. Joey: Well, it's like, last night, I couldn't do the thing that usually makes me great. So I had to do all this other stuff. And the response I got... man, oh man, it was like a ticker tape parade! Chandler: Yes, I know, as it happens my room is very very close to the parade route. Joey: It was amazing! And not just for her... uh-uh. For me, too. It's like, all of a sudden, I'm blind. But all my other senses are heightened, y'know? It's like... I was able to appreciate it on another level. Chandler: I didn't know you had another level. Joey: I know! Neither did I! [Scene: Monica and Rachel's, one week later. Monica is seated, Rachel comes out of her bedroom.] Monica: Hey, great skirt! Birthday present? Rachel: Yeah. Monica: Oh, from who? Rachel: From you. I exchanged the blouse you got me. Monica: Well, it's the thought. Hey, doesn't Ross's flight get in in a couple hours? At gate 27-B? Rachel: Uh, yeah. Uh, Monica, y'know, honey, I've been thinking about it and I've decided this.. this whole Ross thing, it's just not a good idea. Monica: Oh, why? Rachel: Because, I feel like I wouldn't just be going out with him. I would be going out with all of you. Oh, and there would just be all this pressure, and I don't wanna... Monica: (gets up) No, no, no, no, no, no pressure, no pressure! Rachel: Monica, nothing has even happened yet, and you're already so... Monica: I am not 'so'! OK, I was a teensy bit weird at first, but... I'll be good. I promise. (Door buzzer goes off. Rachel answers it.) Rachel: Who is it? Intercom: It's me, Carl. Rachel: C'mon up. Monica: Behind my brother's back? (Rachel glares at her) ... is exactly the kind of crazy thing you won't be hearing from me. [Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is seated, and the apartment is filled with baskets of fruit. Joey enters, check in hand.] Joey: Seven hundred bucks! Chandler: Alright, you did it! Do we have any fruit? Joey: Man, hell of a two weeks, huh? Y'know what, though? I really feel like I learned something. Chandler: Really? So, you're gonna stick with this 'it's all for her' thing? Joey: What, are you crazy? When a blind man gets his sight back, does he walk around like this? (Joey closes his eyes and walks around with arms spread.) [Scene: Monica and Rachel's Balcony, Rachel is having drinks with her date, Carl.] Carl: I'm just sayin', if I see one more picture of Ed Begley, Jr. in that stupid electric car, I'm gonna shoot myself! I mean, don't get me wrong... I'm not against environmental issues per se.... it's just that guy! (Rachel looks bored. At this point, Ross¡Xa figment of Rachel's imagination ¡X shows up on the balcony and starts talking to her.) Ross: I can't believe you'd rather go out with him than me. Rachel: Would you excuse me, please? I'm trying to have a date here. Ross: Fine, just stop thinking about me. (She tries, and Ross disappears momentarily. He reappears, standing closer to her.) Ross: Can't do it, can you? Rachel: So I'm thinking about you. So what? Ross: I don't get it. What do you see in this guy, anyway? Rachel: Well... he happens to be a very nice... guy.... Carl: I mean, come on, buddy, get a real car! Ross: Rachel, come on. Give us a chance. Rachel: Ross, it's too hard. Ross: No, no, no... why, because it might get weird for everyone else? Who cares about them. This is about us. Look, I-I've been in love with you since, like, the ninth grade. Rachel: Ross, you're like my best friend. Ross: I know. Rachel: If we broke up, and I lost you... Ross: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What makes you think we're gonna break up? Rachel: Well, have you been involved with someone where you haven't broken up? Ross: (pause) No. But... it only has to happen once. Look, you and I both know we are perfect for each other, right? I mean... so, the only question is... are you attracted to me? Rachel: I don't know... I mean, I've never looked at you that way before. Ross: Well, start looking. (They kiss. Ross walks away, and then fades out.) Rachel: Wow. Carl: Exactly! And you just know I'm gonna be the guy caught behind this hammerhead in traffic! Rachel: Right! You're right! Carl: Heh... y'know? Rachel: You know what? Carl: What? Rachel: I forgot... I am supposed to pick up a friend at the airport. I am so sorry! I'm so... if you want to stay, and finish your drinks, please do.... (gives him her drink) I mean... I'm sorry. I-I-I gotta go. I'm sorry. (Rachel leaves.) Carl: But... [Scene: Airport. Madonna's Take A Bow plays in the background as Rachel waits at the gate with flowers.] Rachel: (sifting through crowd) Excuse me, pardon me, excuse me, excuse me, sorry. Hi. [Cut to the jetway, the old man who the flight attendant delivered Rachel's message to gets off the plane, his wife still upset with him.] Man: For God's sake, will you let it go? There's no Rachel! (A Chinese woman getting off the plane drops one of her bags. Ross gets off next.) Ross: Oh, hey, hey, I got that. (Ross picks up the bag... then he and the woman kiss.) Julie: Oh, thanks, sweetie. Ross: No problem. I cannot wait for you to meet my friends. Julie: Really? Ross: Yeah. Julie: You don't think they'll judge and ridicule me? Ross: No, no, they will. I just... uh... Ross and Julie: Can't wait. Ross: Come on, they're gonna love you. [Cut to a close-up of Rachel, eagerly awaiting Ross's arrival... not knowing he is getting off the plane with another woman.] End --



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