Part 4 [Scene: The Emergency Room, Monica sits with Rachel, who is filling out an honest form at last. Ross and Chandler hurtle in. Little Marcel, wrapped in a fluffy towel, is cradled in Ross's arms. They dash up to the admissions desk. Ross is frantic.] Ross: You've got to help me my monkey swallowed a 'K'! (Hearing her brother's voice, Monica gets up to stand behind Chandler, followed by Rachel.) Nurse: (angrily) You go get that animal outta here. Ross: No, no you don't understand the animal hospital is way across town he's choking I don't know what else to do. Monica: What's goin' on? (Ross and Chandler turn at the voice...) Chandler: Marcel swallowed a Scrabble tile. Rachel: Oh. (..then turn back to the desk when the surprise hits them, and Ross and Chandler whip around once more. Monica and Rachel recoil slightly.) Nurse: Excuse me... This hospital is for people! Ross: Lady, he is people. He has a name, okay? He watches Jeopardy! He he touches himself when nobody's watching. Please, please have a heart! (Ross's vigorous protest is attracting attention.) Dr. Mitchell: I'll take a look at him. (Rachel, Monica, Ross and Chandler whip around for a second time, in formation.) Rachel and Monica: Oh, thank you. Monica: Michael. Dr. Mitchell: Rachel. Rachel: What? Monica: (as Rachel) Monica. Rachel: (as Monica) Oh. Monica: (as Rachel) Hi. Rachel: (as Monica) Hi. (Monica smiles to cover her embarrassment, but Rachel sadly looks away...) [Scene: Central Perk, Joey is playing "She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not" with the petals of a flower, alternately looking hopeful and annoyed. Phoebe enters, but not as herself, for she has changed the style of her hair and make-up to match that of her twin sister. She hangs up her coat, revealing her new cardigan. Nervously, she smooths out the identifying garment, approaching Joey who sits next to the main sofa.] Phoebe: (as Ursula) Hey. Joey: Urse... (Phoebe nods as he stands up in delight.) Joey: ..ah, what're you doing here? I've been trying to call you. Phoebe: (as Ursula) Listen, um... Joey: No, no, no, don't say "listen." I know that "listen." I've said that "listen." Phoebe: (as Ursula) I'm sorry. Joey: I don't get it. What happened? What about everything you said under the bridge? (Phoebe is almost thrown by this.) Phoebe: (as Ursula): Yeah, um... (nervously clears her throat) You know you, you should just forget about what I said under the bridge, I was talkin' crazy that night, I was so drunk! Joey: You don't drink. Phoebe: (as Ursula) That's right, I don't... But I was, I was drunk on you! Joey: Oh, Urse... (He tries to take her in his arms, but she fends him off.) Phoebe: (as Ursula) Okay, yeah, so it's not gonna work. Joey: Why? Is it because I'm friends with Phoebe? Phoebe: (as Ursula) If it was, would you stop hanging out with her? Joey: (Thinking carefully) no. No, I, I couldn't do that. Phoebe: (as Ursula) Um, then yes, it's 'cause of Phoebe! So, you know, it's either her or me. Joey: Then, uh, then I'm sorry. (He sinks to the sofa, saddened by Ursula's ultimatum, while Phoebe follows, touched by Joey's good heart.) Phoebe: (as Ursula) You know... (unconsciously putting a hand on his knee) You're gonna be really, really hard to get over. Joey: I know... (He looks up at her face and Phoebe, slipping out of character, smiles back at him. Joey's voice becomes soft and warm.) Joey: I don't know whether it's just 'cause we're breakin' up or... what, but you have never looked so beautiful. Phoebe: Really? (Phoebe smiles, when Joey takes her face in his hands and kisses her. Joey gets up to leave but stops suddenly. Phoebe silently shouts "Oh, whoa!!" to herself, and leans back in the sofa to recover, a hand to her tingling lips. A thoughtful Joey is also feeling his lips, so he hesitates for a moment, then returns for a better view, he thinks again, cocking his head from side to side to regard her profile from various angles, then...) Joey: Pheebs? Phoebe: (Automatically) Yeah. Oooh... (she's sprung.) [Scene: The Hospital, Marcel lies on the operating table while recovering from the anaesthetic, tucked up under a sheet like an infant in a huge bed. Ross sits beside him, as a smiling Chandler, Monica and Rachel look on.] Ross: He looks so tiny. (The door bursts open, and Joey and Phoebe rush in.) Joey: We just got the message. Phoebe: Is he alright? Ross: Yeah. The doctor got the 'K' out. He also found an 'M' and an 'O'. Chandler: We think he was trying to spell out 'MONKEY.' (Ross does not approve of Chandler's daft theory.) Ross: Well, the doctor says he's gonna be fine, he's just sleeping now. Chandler: (Tapping Ross on his shoulder) So, you feel like a dad yet? Ross: No, why? Chandler: Hey, come on, you came through, you did what you had to do. That is very dad. (Ross does approve of this, but he's still not sure. The tiny figure stirs.) Monica: Oh, look, he's waking up! Ross: (Quietly) hey, fella! How you doing? (All of a sudden, Marcel grabs Ross's finger with his whole fist, and he squeezes it, so tight, that Ross finally knows what it is to be a father. He looks up at his friends, who smile encouragingly, Rachel tenderly resting her chin upon Monica's shoulder. Ross realises that Chandler was right and he's gonna make a great dad!) Closing Credits [Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone except Joey is there. Rachel is looking out of the window and Ross is handing out some Chinese takeout. There's a small SAP in the corner of the screen.] Ross: Aqui est? (Here it is!) Monica: ? qui? pidio el pollo General Tso? (Who ordered General Sal's chicken?) Chandler: 梍udo aver sido General Tso! (It could've been General Sal!) (Rachel points out of the window.) Rachel: 桒ira, mira, el viejo desnudo est?haciendo el hula hoop! (Look, look, Ugly Naked Guy is doing the hula!) (The others rush to the window for a look.) All:枩www! (Ewww!) (Joey enters, happy again.) All: 栀ola, Joey! (Hi, Joey!) Joey: 栀ola, amigos! (Hey, everybody!) (Marcel grabs the remote.) Monica: Mira, Ross, Marcel se llevo el control remoto. (Look, Ross, Marcel's got the remote.) Ross: 桊o que sucedio es que no le gusta la tele! (The thing is, he doesn`t like the program!) (Everybody laughs.) End --

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