102 - The One With the Sonogram at the End - PART 01 Written by: Marta Kauffman & David Crane Transcribed by: guineapig [Scene Central Perk, everyone's there.] Monica: What you guys don't understand is, for us, kissing is as important as any part of it. Joey: Yeah, right!.......Y'serious? Phoebe: Oh, yeah! Rachel: Everything you need to know is in that first kiss. Monica: Absolutely. Chandler: Yeah, I think for us, kissing is pretty much like an opening act, y'know? I mean it's like the stand-up comedian you have to sit through before Pink Floyd comes out. Ross: Yeah, and-and it's not that we don't like the comedian, it's that-that... that's not why we bought the ticket. Chandler: The problem is, though, after the concert's over, no matter how great the show was, you girls are always looking for the comedian again, y'know? I mean, we're in the car, we're fighting traffic... basically just trying to stay awake. Rachel: Yeah, well, word of advice: Bring back the comedian. Otherwise next time you're gonna find yourself sitting at home, listening to that album alone. Joey: (pause)....Are we still talking about sex? Opening Credits [Scene: Museum of Prehistoric History, Ross and a co-worker (Marsha) are setting up an exhibit which includes some mannequins of cave people.] Ross: No, it's good, it is good, it's just that- mm- doesn't she seem a little angry? Marsha: Well, she has issues. Ross: Does she. Marsha: He's out banging other women over the head with a club, while she sits at home trying to get the mastodon smell out of the carpet! Ross: Marsha, these are cave people. Okay? They have issues like 'Gee, that glacier's getting kinda close.' See? Marsha: Speaking of issues, isn't that your ex-wife? (Carol, Ross's ex-wife, has entered behind them and is standing outstide the exhibit.) Ross: (trying to ignore her) No. No. Marsha: Yes, it is. Carol! Hi! Ross: Okay, okay, yes, it is. (waves) How about I'll, uh, catch up with you in the Ice Age. (Marsha extis and Ross waves Carol into the exhibit.) Ross:Hi. Carol: So. Ross: You look great. I, uh... I hate that. Carol: Sorry. You look good too. Ross: Ah, well, in here, anyone who... stands erect... So what's new? Still, uh... Carol: A lesbian? Ross: Well... you never know. How's, um.. how's the family? Carol: Marty's still totally paranoid. Oh, and, uh- Ross: Why- why are you here, Carol? Carol: I'm pregnant. Ross: Pregnant?! --

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