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Associations with the wind translated from Cranejay's prose When thinking of the wind, sorrow and happiness are just what I call to mind. Why are these two opposite poles put together? It's because sorrow and happiness is antithesis within two sides of an object, just as the palm and back of hand. And the wind plays the role of transmitting information. He perceives these two kinds of emotions simultaneously. While I am sad, the wind exists; the wind also exists when I am cheerful. He enjoys the joy and sadness of accompanying me, resembling the small fan at my home which always caresses me softly in nomatter which season. In summer, he cherrily lifts his head blowing me as he does; in winter he utters no words with his drooping head as if he can comprehend my sorrows. Why I am sad is owing to the taking away of the accumulated wintry happiness by summer after the leave of winter. And summer is the season of perspiration; perspiration represents weeping tears, but we shed tears through our bodies. After going through the season of the north wind's reminding days, we begin to shed tears through our bodies. I still reminisce that winter when the world is not friendly anymore, and the everyday becomes ruthless. I incurred a disease; its scientific name is paranoia. The wind blew fiercely as though people's ceaseless sneer. I began to suspect that everyone on the street, even the whole world, jeered at me; therefore, I got bogged down in the swirl of the destined course of its sickness. I began to be incapable of eating meals, speaking, and expressing my agony. In the hospital, there was no wind but only an air-conditioning system; The space lapsed into a kind of coldness of getting lost in meditations. I kept a diary desperately and perspired desperately; the space was as if being urged by my precipitance and had no choice but to perspire. But it was also just at that time when I realized what the greatest bliss is; I realized friends' concern, parents' grief, and medical professionals' meticulous care. Summer came. All things were changed to be different, and people around me urged me to become a student. I put on my clothes, carried backpack on my back, and was going to start to go to school! But before I was fully accustomed to the uncomfortableness resulted from my disease, I had had to begin to write school assignments, prepare exams, chat with classmates, ask teachers questions, and so on. The result of my final grades came out; I failed in each subject, and I was bewildered. During that period, it was so hard for me to endure. Later on, I decided to suspend my schooling finally, and it resulted in my fate now. I recall Zhuo Wen Xuan's song "The Long Sleeves", singing "The long sleeves, turning over in the wind, / As if the surging wind and scudding cloud in mind..." The omnipresent and recurring wind implicitly signifies the beautiful artistic prospect of the metempsychosis of the soul and that humans' own aspiration and pursuit within its limitation defines themselves, as expressed in this song. In the hospital, I have met many companions and seen with my own eyes many of them died. During this course, so many unuttered words and various feelings fill my mind; along with the wind, I have also more profoundly comprehended the meaning of life. --



※ 发信站: 批踢踢实业坊(ptt.cc)
◆ From: 124.8.77.66 ※ 编辑: Sangreal 来自: 124.8.77.66 (04/28 22:40)







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