https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rz0xSBePS9w 标题中译﹕摸根废力慢讲解世界杯 (以下先附原汁原味的旁白﹐之後再附翻译) ======================================================================= The World Cup. Billions hold their breath as a champion is forged inside the crucible of earth's biggest sporting event. Oh, I've heard the doubters. They say to me, "Morgan, I am an American, and a heterosexual. Why in tar nation should I waste my time watching El Copa Mundial?" I'll tell you why, my friend. Guys getting hit---- in the nuts. Hot damn! No other spectacle offers as much nut-crushing action as the World Cup. Sacs are obliterated. Nads are squashed. Testicles are utterly destroyed. Uh-oh! Looks like someone got a red card--- on their balls. Top striker can send a ball at a man's groin at more than 130km/hr. Now I don't play that metric crap, but even I know that will flatten your hairy pouch into a pancake that is going to ache like a bitch for weeks. And don't get me started on the beauty of cleat to balls action. Holy Mother of exploded testies! There is nothing, and I mean nothing, as sweet as the sound of a diamond- tipped soccer boot finding a man's floppy treasure. This is why it is called the beautiful game. ========================================================================== 世界杯 在全球最盛大的运动比赛中﹐上亿人屏息目睹冠军的诞生。 喔﹐我知道有人不这麽认为。 他们对我说﹕“摸根﹐我是个美国人﹐又是个异性恋。我干嘛浪费时间看世界杯﹖” 朋友﹐让我告诉你为什麽。 男人们被打中--------蛋蛋。 哇靠﹗ 除了世界杯﹐再也没有别的盛事能提供这麽多爆蛋画面了。 子孙袋被打爆。小丸子被铲平。蛋蛋被彻底毁灭。 喔喔。好像有人被发了红牌--在他的球球上。 顶尖的攻击球员可以将一颗足球以高过每小时130公里的速度射向别人的命根。 我从来不在乎什麽狗屁数学﹐ 但我也知道那可以把你的小毛球打到扁得跟松饼一样﹐还会痛彼娘亲好几个礼拜。 而且千万别让我谈起那精美的脚vs蛋。 蛋蛋爆炸的神之境界啊。 没有别的东西﹐我强调﹕没有任何东西﹐ 可以比得上满是尖钻的钉鞋终於踢中男人的趴趴走小宝贝时发出的甜美声音。 这就是为什麽人们称它为美丽的游戏。 --

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