Growing up, Durant told me, he was a sore loser. That all changed one day when he was 11, after he got destroyed by his father in a game of one on one in the driveway. “Of course I knew I was gonna lose,” he said. “He was so much bigger and stronger than me. He was backing me down, dunking, pushing me. He was screaming, talking trash. I scored like one point.” Little Kevin was so upset by the loss (and, presumably, by the bullying) that he burst into tears, ran into the house, locked the door and refused to let his father in. The intensity of his own crying surprised him and, after a while, inspired some self-reflection. “I sat back and thought about it and was like, What am I so mad at?” Durant told me, and in that moment, he said, he made a decision. “It’s good to be passionate, it’s good to hate losing — but I’ve got to channel it the right way,” he said. “You know what I mean? And after a while I just started to learn to leave it where it’s at, get rid of it. Once you’re done and you’re off the court or out of the venue or whatever, go back to being you.” Durant’s story touched on something I’ve thought about often while watching him play. If there’s been one consistent criticism of him, it’s that he’s not aggressive enough — that he fails to use his unearthly skills, as Jordan or Charles Barkley or Kobe would have done, to destroy everybody in his path. There are times, during games, when he seems almost removed from the action, simultaneously there and not there. I always figured that this detachment was just a byproduct of his smoothness: it looks so easy for him, when he strokes four consecutive 3-pointers or tosses in a little half-hook over two defenders, that it’s tempting to imagine he’s thinking about other things the whole time — that the real Kevin Durant is watching from a little viewing platform deep inside his own head, reading a magazine and clipping his nails, ready to re-engage fully when things get intense. But now I suspect that that uncanny stillness, that sense of remove, is the outward manifestation of Durant’s internal control, a sign of his fluency in moving between worlds: aggressive and relaxed, nasty and nice. Occasionally you can see Durant moving between those worlds, and the transition is jarring. There are moments, for instance, when he dunks and in his excitement begins to stare down his opponent, showboat-style, and you think, No, no, no, no, Kevin Durant, so much of my worldview depends on you not being the type of person who stares people down after dunks. And then, inevitably, a second or so later, he seems to catch himself and jogs back down the court to give all the credit to his teammates. You can see the impulse and the correction — the (to get Freudian for a second) ego and the superego. This turns out to be a useful way to think about the Thunder. In “ Civilization and Its Discontents,” Freud argues that humans are ruled by two warring impulses: love, which seeks to bind people into larger and larger groups, and aggression, which seeks to tear them apart. For civilization to work, on even the most basic level, each of us has to find an acceptable outlet for that antisocial aggression. Back in the driveway, Durant’s father directed his aggression toward him. Freud argues that most of us, however, learn to turn our aggression inward, where it morphs into what he calls the superego — the policeman of the psyche, watching us constantly to ensure (with its billy club of guilt) that we make choices for the benefit of the group, not just for our own egos. That psychic self-surveillance, Freud says, is one of the big prices we pay for civilization — a kind of voluntary tax we levy against ourselves for the privilege of living with others. Kevin Durant oozes superego. Even as we talked on our folding chairs after practice, I sensed a duality. He was simultaneously genuine and polished, open and guarded. This seems to be an inevitable consequence of living the life of a superstar, especially in a place like Oklahoma City. Last summer there was public outrage, in some quarters, when it was discovered that Durant ’s torso — the skin under his jersey, which by design is publicly hidden — is covered with tattoos. One evening I went to the mall to observe one of Durant’s public events. He was at a GameStop, signing copies of a new video game that featured him on its cover. I arrived to find the OKC equivalent of Beatlemania: a line of people, decked out in Thunder gear, stretching out the door and wrapping around the neighboring stores. As I approached the scene, a policeman was dragging a young man who apparently tried to get too close down an escalator. Just then a huge cheer broke out from the crowd. Durant had arrived, through a back entrance, along with a small entourage. I squeezed past the line, stood at the side of the room and watched him throughout the session. He was wearing his signature “KD” gear: hat, T-shirt, sweats. He seemed friendly but also not totally present. Between signatures and photos, he would occasionally grab his phone and sneak a text message under the table. He bantered, here and there, with a couple of kids, but mostly he was quiet and dutiful. His smile seemed automatic. I got the sense that Kevin Durant, the actual 24-year-old guy with the secret tattoos, was hardly even there that night: he was just an avatar for his own fame — this abstract thing that doesn’t actually exist but is millions of times bigger than he is. Not that that was his fault, of course. Even if Durant wanted to genuinely connect with people that night, the sheer scale made it impossible. There was too much inflow for a single person’s outflow. I got a sense of how insane it must be to live that kind of life, in which things are like that every day, everywhere. Is it even possible to be a good, thoughtful, civic-minded person under that kind of pressure? Suddenly all of those sociopathic scoring champions made sense to me. Radical detachment seemed, in a strange and sad way, almost like the proper response. Toward the end of our post-practice conversation, Durant leaned over and started unlacing his shoes. I took this as a signal that he was ready to leave. He was tired, no doubt, and had other things to do. I wrapped up our interview and thanked him for his time. He popped immediately out of his seat and walked away. After a few steps, he seemed to catch himself. He turned around, walked back and shook my hand. “Nice to meet you,” he said. Durant告诉我，小时候的他曾是一个输不起的孩子。但其11岁那年的某一天，这一切突然 发生了转变。那日，Durant家的父子俩在车道上进行一对一的斗牛比赛，结果小Durant惨 遭败北。“我心里当然清楚，输的一方是自己，”Durant回忆说：“他（父亲）可比我高 大多了，强壮多了。他可以背身单打我，当着我的面扣篮，还使力推挤我。他语调高亢， 嘴里还讲着垃圾话。我印像中，自己貌似只得到到一分的样子。” 这场惨淡的失利（或者，推测来说，是父亲表现出来的这种“恃强凌弱”），让小 Durant深感难过不安。他突然哇哇大哭起来，冲进家里，将自己反锁在房间内，并且把父 亲拒之门外。小Durant的哭泣声之洪亮，把他自个儿都吓了一跳。过了一会儿，他开始进 行自我反思。Durant这样描述当时自己的想法“我静静地坐着沉思，然後想自己到底在气 些什麽呢？” KD对我说，在那一刻，当时尚小的他就在心里默默做出了一个决定。“热 情昂扬当然是好事，痛恨失败也没有错——但是我必须找到一个恰当的方式，去排解这些 情绪。” KD解释道：“哥们你懂我的意思吧？在那之後不久，我便开始学着不以物喜， 不以己悲。一旦你完成比赛，走下球场，离开球馆。。。等等诸如此类的事情结束後，就 回归原来的自己吧。” Durant口述的这个故事，恰恰触动了我看过他比赛後的一些所思所想。如果说，优秀如 Durant者，亦长久以来承受着一种批评之音，便是对其侵略性不够的指摘——Durant并不 像飞人Jordan，或者Barkley，又或者Kobe等人那样，运用自己出神入化的篮球技艺，把 每一个挡在身前的对手摧毁殆尽。有时候，Durant在比赛中显得彷佛游离不定，给予旁人 他在场同时又似乎不在的错综矛盾之感。 我以前总是认为，Durant的这种超然於外，是由他自身那种飘逸流畅衍生而出的：无论 是连续四记的三分命中，亦或是迎着两名防守者的半勾手投篮，一切都显得那麽行云 流 水，轻而易举。不禁让人臆测，其实Durant自始至终都心神不属，在思考着其他事情—— 而那个真正的“Kevin Durant ”，站在KD内心深处的了望平台之上，观察外界，洞悉世 事。“他”正翻阅着一本杂志或者修剪着自己的指甲，同时也准备着在局势紧张的关头再 次身心合一，全神投入。 但现在，我怀疑Durant身上那种不可思议的沉静，那种超然物外的感觉，实际上是他内 心掌控力的外在体现，表明Durant在两种状态：火花四溢和云淡风轻，（场上的）激烈竞 技与（场下的）宽和待人之间，灵活转化，切换自如。 我们间或可以看到，Durant是如何在这两个世界间游移变身的。尽管这种转变，还并未 达到完全协调的地步。举例来说，有些时候当KD上演华丽一扣後，他会处於兴奋当中，怒 目而视对手，摆出一种意图炫耀的架势。然後我们会默想，不，不，不，不，Kevin Durant先生，请勿毁掉我们以往建立在你身上的世界观啊，亲你可不是那种在灌篮之後， 会直盯得对手不敢与之对视的球员啊。片刻之後，也不过就是几秒钟的时间，KD几乎必然 地会拉回自己的思绪，转身沿着球场慢慢回跑，随後毫不吝啬地将所有功劳都归诸於队友 们。你能从中看到KD的情不自禁和自我纠正——而这（运用弗洛伊德那套学说来分析）就 是所谓的“自我”和“超我”。（注1） 事实证明，这不失为一种思考雷霆行之有效的方法。在其着作《文明及其缺憾》一书中 ，弗洛伊德提出人类被两种交织存在、互相冲突着的力量所操控：爱，它力求把人们约束 在越发壮大的群体当中；而人与生俱来的攻击性，却试图把人们从中分拨离析（注2）。 文明要想发挥它的作用，哪怕是达到其中最基础的层次，则我们每一个人都必须找到一个 可被接受的出口，去释放自己这种反社会的攻击性。 回到KD故事中的那条车道上吧。当时Durant的父亲，便对儿子展示出了自己富有攻击性的 那一面。弗洛伊德阐释道，大多数人都学着将这种攻击性内化於心，演进成了被他称之为 “超我”的东西——它是灵魂的守护者，运用手中那名曰“罪恶感”的武器，时时刻刻对 我们察言观行；以确保我们做出有利於集体，而非只顾自我的选择。弗洛伊德说，这种精 神监督是我们自身为了人类文明而付出的一大代价——是一种为了换取和他人同生共存， 而自愿缴纳的“税费”。 而Kevin Durant的身上，就流露出了这种超我意识。即使是在训练後，我们俩坐在折叠椅 上聊天之时，我也可以感觉得到他的那种双重性——兼具了真诚恳挚和圆滑机敏，开朗外 向和谨慎保守。对於一位超级明星而言，这种二元性似乎是不可避免的事情，尤其是处於 诸如俄城此类地方的话。去年夏天，当Durant的纹身曝光——它们被刺在球衣所掩盖的皮 肤位置，如此刻意设计当然是想避开公众的眼睛——还曾经激起过一部分地区的球迷怒火 。 有一天夜里，我到一家购物中心观看Durant出席公众活动。KD将在一个电玩商舖，签售一 款崭新的、以他为封面形象的电子游戏。当我到达目的地，见证了等同於披头士狂热般的 （注3）俄城公众：人们排成一列长龙，衣饰装扮尽显“最炫雷霆风”，队伍从这家店门 口一直延伸至毗邻的商场。我走近现场的时候，看到一位警员正拽着一个小伙子，显然後 者试图过分靠近那个自动扶梯。就在此时，人群里爆发出一阵欢呼雀跃之声。Durant由一 位个子不高的随行人员陪同着，从後面的入口走了出来。我勉力挤过人群，站在房间的一 边，并且整场活动都在观察着Durant。 他全身穿戴着印有“ KD ”字样的行头：帽子，T 恤，运动衫。活动过程中，Durant看 上去一直都是那样亲切和善，却也多少有点心不在焉。签名与合影的间歇，他不时也会掏 出手机，在桌下悄悄发着短信。KD 会和几个孩子四处逗笑，但大多数时候，他还是保持 安静，尽忠职守。到了後面，他的笑容似乎是自动化，无意识的。 我油然生出一种感觉，Kevin Durant，这位纹有隐秘刺青，年方24 岁的年轻人，此时此 地其实并不在这里：今夜出现在公众面前的，只不过是一个承载着KD 名望的化身而已— —这个抽象的化身实际上并不存在，但却比本尊要庞大上千万倍。 这并不是Durant的错。即使他希望诚心实意地和粉丝们交流，但单单一个和芸芸众人之间 的规模差距，也注定了此番心愿是不太可能的。这边厢有太多的人表情达意，输入信息； 而相较之下，在那边厢输出信息的人，却只有Durant一个。我蓦然觉得，要是每天每地， 都不得不过着如此这般的生活，该会是多麽教人疯狂的一件事。若处於此种压力之下，还 可能成为一个品行优良，深思熟虑，热心公益的人麽？ 突然之间，我理解了那些历任得分王们为何会离经叛道，不爱社交。他们以激进的姿态游 离世外，用这样一种奇异而悲哀的方式，几乎就像是对外界做出了自己合适的回应。 当结束了我们之间这番练习後的交谈，Durant弯下身，开始解他的鞋带。我了解这是他 准备离开的信号。毫无疑问，他已经有些疲倦，而且还有别的事情要忙。我就此次访谈做 了一下总结，并感谢他能抽空配合。话音一落，Durant迅速从座椅上起身离开。走出几步 之後，他突然像是回过了神，转过身，走回来并同我握手：“很高兴见到你。”Durant如 是说。 （part 3 完） 本文注释 注1： 本我、自我与超我 ——在心理动力学中，自我（id）、本我（ego）和超我（super-ego ）是由奥地利精神分析学家弗洛伊德之结构理论所提出，精神的三大部分。1923年，弗洛 伊德提出相关概念，以解释意识和潜意识的形成和相互关系。“本我”（完全潜意识）代 表慾望，受意识遏抑；“自我”（大部分有意识）负责处理现实世界的事情；“超我”（ 部分有意识）是良知或内在的道德判断。 自我，自我，超我构成了人的完整的人格。人的一切心理活动都可以从他们之间的联系中 得到合理的解释，自我是永久存在的，而超我和本我又几乎是永久对立的，为了协调本我 和超我之间的矛盾，自我需要进行调节。若个人承受的来自本我、超我和外界压力过大而 产生焦虑时，自我就会帮助启动防御机制。防御机制有：压抑、否认、退行、抵消、投射 、昇华等等。 注2： 《文明及其缺憾》( Civilization and its Discontents ) , 是奥地利着名精神病学家 、精神分析学派心理学创始人弗洛伊德晚年的作品之一。於1929年首次出版。 作者在书中指出，人的本性是攻击性，以自我为中心，不断追求本能慾望的满足，而社会 的发展则要求对个体的这种本能加以约束和控制。因而文明正是在个体对自由的追求和社 会对遵从的要求，这一永恒的对立和冲突中得以由低级向高级不断演进。 注3: 披头士狂热( Beatlemania), 又可解做披头士乐队迷, 甲壳虫狂等. 这是由着名的披头士乐队(The Beatles ) 而来的一个衍生词,原指对20世纪60年代英 国“披头士”四人乐队表现的狂热情绪.也可化用为对其他人或事物的痴迷.在本文里就是 这种用法,喻指粉丝们对Durant的深切喜爱. http://bbs.hupu.com/4911026.html --

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