作者dvlin (Dee)
看板ST-English
标题Re: [写作班] 托福第31周 ynyn, 3
时间Sat Mar 14 00:20:32 2009
※ 引述《ynyn (为何总是不顺利...)》之铭言:
: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Watching television is
: bad for children.
: A:
: Today, television is a common technological product around the world. So many
^the; same below
: people regard television as their live, especially for children. Although not
lives xxx
: all channels of television is bad for children, some channels still harm
xxxxxxxxxxxxx are
: children deeply in their childhood. Government should prohibit these
The government
: inappropriate show or channels.
shows
: In the competitive TV market, many companies create very inappropriate show
: such as violent show, blood show and criminal show in order to attract
shows;
: teenagers and adults. The show would resort children’s mind even their live.
^^^^^^ minds lives
I think you mean "distort"
: According to several reports, many crime behaviors are caused by teenagers
criminal (adj.)
: who love to watch these violent programs. Some psychologists point out these
: shows would keep in children’s mind deeply. Thus, decreasing children to
or "preventing children from"
: watching these programs is necessary.
: In addition, take education and family for example, so many children go back
: to home soon after classes because they want to watch their favorite show.
xx
: Children usually decrease their time to do some excises and activities even
doing ,
'to do' vs. 'doing'
Decreasing their time to do something: 减少(其他的)时间,用来做某件事情
Decreasing their time doing something: 减少花在做某件事情的时间
: homework. Thus, now, so many children have the overweight problem. Also,
weight problems
: children spend too many time to watch TV including meal time and their free
,
: time. They forget to maintain the relationship of their family. Parents do
with
^^^^^^'neglect' is a more suitable word here
: not know not only what happened in children’s school time, but also how to
happens ^their
: help children when they have some problems.
^their; or simply 'them'
: Decreasing these inappropriate shows is very important issue for government.
^a ^the
: The shows and channels would influence children’s live deeply. Thus,
lives
: children should not watch the shows but spend more time to do living
^should ^^^^^^
: activities.
What's a 'living activity'? Perhaps simply 'other activities' here?
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