作者chileno (月月)
看板ST-English
标题Re: [写作班-computer]
时间Fri Oct 19 13:52:19 2007
※ 引述《Luge (不认识)》之铭言:
Just about a few decades ago, computer did not exist,
and of course there were not internet, BBS, Windows, etc.
1. about多余了,可以去掉。
2. of course如果用certainly感觉会比较有程度一点点 XD
3. "there were..."可以改用下面这个句型会更漂亮:
"there was no such thing as...."
However, everything changed as the first computer devised.
这句这样写会更漂亮:
"However, everything changed with the invention of the first
computer."
Its powerful calculational ability help us overwhelm lots of mathemathic
calculation, which largely speeds up the development of science and technology.
1. calculational ability 有点怪,可是查了一下找不到适当的词。
2. help应该用helps,第三人称单数。
3. overwhelm是「压倒、推翻」的意思,你想表达的是?
Furthermore, the appearance of Windows and internet also makes computer much
easier to be accepted by everyone.
1. appearance用interface会不会比较好?
2. internet一般是打成大写的"the Internet"。
3. apperance of...後面接了两个东西,所以应该用复数的appearances,
後面的动词也应该随之改为make。
Nowadays, to open our computer and connect it with internet for referencing
data, making friends, geting new information, or some other matters become
a very frequent action to everyone.
1. to open应该改用 "turning on"
2. connect後面连接词应该用to 而不是with
3. reference似乎不能当动词。你要说的是searching for,
还是referring to?
4. 几个动词应该统一一下全部用动名词,然後,因为有好几个动作,
不太适合再用a very frequent action,用复数可能比较好。
: Computer unanimously occupies an important position in our daily life.
1. unanimously比较是指人「无异议」、「无疑问」,不太适合讲「事情」。
我会用doubtlessly、surely、unquestionably。
2. our daily "lives",这里用复数比较好。
请参考罗。
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1F:推 Luge:感谢C大的指教^^ 10/19 14:34