※ [本文转录自 PHX-Suns 看板] 作者: kerrys (台北不是我的家) 看板: PHX-Suns 标题: [外电] Everybody is down on the Shaq deal. Guess what? 时间: Wed Feb 20 22:31:34 2008 原文出处： http://sports.espn.go.com/espnmag/story?id=3243576 -- You probably have been waiting to read one writer dumb enough to defend the Shaq trade. Well, look no further. Here I am. 你或许早就在等待，等待是否会有一个愚蠢至极的作者会替大欧这笔交易说些正面的 话。嗯，不用再找啦，我就是那个人。 Remember, I'm the guy who wrote a column called "Welcome to the No Balls Association" last year, after the deadline passed without a major trade. I found it appalling that so many GMs had a chance to compete for a title— whether it was a puncher's chance or a legitimate one—except nobody had the imagination or testicular fortitude to go all in. Instead, the entire league checked on the flop. 记得吧，我就是那个在去年交易截止日过後没看到任何大交易案出现愤而写下"欢迎来 到没球打联盟(No Balls Association)"专栏的家伙。我发现一个惊人的事实就是竟然有这 麽多的总管有机会去争夺总冠军 - 不管这个机会是微乎其微或是一半一半 - 根本没有人 有足够的想像力或够硬的卵蛋敢把全身家当给押下去。相反的，整个联盟的人都会在第一 张牌翻开时就停手，只跟进但不再下注。 So it would be hypocritical of me to crush Steve Kerr and the Suns. Yeah, they could have gotten more for Shawn Marion. Yeah, you never want to make a trade in which the other team responds, "We'll do it!" in 0.00045 seconds. (Kerr could have at least pushed the Heat for the right to swap first-rounders once between 2009 and 2013.) Yeah, this was like Phoenix's getting Jack Nicholson in the Departed stage of his career instead of The Shining or even As Good as It Gets. Yeah, there's a good possibility that this will fail miserably and Kerr will be back on TNT before we know it. 所以如果我在此大肆批评Steve Kerr和太阳，我就是个伪善者。是的，他们确实能用 Matrix换回更多的东西。是的，你绝不会希望做出一笔其他球队在0.00045秒内就回答，" 就这麽定了！"的交易。(Kerr至少可以要求热火多送一枚'09-'13年之间的第一轮选秀权吧 。)是的，这就像凤凰城在Jack Nicholson已经逐渐走下坡的"神鬼无间(2007)"时期才邀请 他来演戏，而不是在"鬼店(1980)"或甚至是"爱在心里口难开(1997)"的当红时期就邀请到 他。是的，很有可能这笔交易不会有个完美的结果而Kerr将会在我们得到消息之前就回锅 TNT担任球评。 But that's the cool thing: If the trade doesn't work, Kerr gets canned. If it does work, he's a genius. There is no middle ground. We rarely see an NBA executive put himself in such a position because the basketball universe is so much more public now, thanks to a phalanx of websites, blogs and message boards on which everyone thinks they're smarter than every GM. Screw up once, and you're raked through the coals for eternity. Why would anyone ever roll the dice and risk his job? 不过有件事情很酷：如果这笔交易不成功，Kerr会被火掉。如果这笔交易成功了，他 就是个天才。不成功，便成仁，没有中间的模糊地带。我们很少会看到有一个NBA总管把自 己置身於这样如履薄冰的情境之中，由网页、部落格和留言板所交织而成的网路世界已经 让现今的篮球圈几乎毫无保留地呈现在大家面前，而几乎每个人都认为他们比每一位总管 还聪明。搞砸一次，你大概会永远被当作大家的笑柄。为什麽会有人敢拿自己的工作当赌 注，用掷骰子来决定自己的未来呢？ Well, Kerr didn't care what anyone might think. He spent three months watching his Suns play joyless, businesslike basketball and be abused by every quality low-post scorer. Everyone else on the team seemed beaten down by having to cater to Marion and Amare, and Steve Nash looked like a dispirited alpha dog on a Survivor tribe that keeps falling short in every challenge. On paper, assuming he isn't washed-up, Shaq was a logical play for a team that desperately needed a big guy and better chemistry. Who breathes life into a moribund team like Shaq if he's in a good mood? It's like adding Jeffrey Ross to a celebrity roast dais: You can't quantify his impact. 嗯，Kerr并不在乎其他人怎麽想。过去三个月的时间他亲眼看到他的太阳打着无精打 采、一板一眼的比赛，而且被每一个低位得分高手蹂躏践踏。似乎队上每一个人都已经对 必须迎合Matrix和小史感到厌倦，而球队一哥Nash看起来就像在Survivor生存游戏中一次 又一次的挑战中对夺冠越来越不抱希望的领头羊。理论上，假设大欧不是不行了，那对一 支迫切需要一个大个子以及良好化学效应的球队来说，他会是个合适的人选。大欧在那支 死气沉沉的球队已经憋了一肚子鸟气，如果他能有好心情，那就像是在名人BBQ聚餐上加聘 Jeffery Ross上台主持一样：你无法量化他带来的正面帮助会有多大。 There was also an addition-by-subtraction element everyone ignored—namely, what was so indispensable about Marion? A year ago, this magazine wrote a story about Marion in which he admitted he couldn't decide if it would be more fun to be part of a great team or to be the best player on a decent one. It's not that he's a bad guy, just a little delusional, the David Caruso of the game: someone who doesn't realize how good he has it until it is taken away. 另外还有一点，每个人都忘了舍得舍得，有舍才有得。意思是说，到底球队有多需要 Matrix呢？一年前，这杂志刊登了一篇关於Matrix的专访，他承认他没办法确定，到底是 在一支一流劲旅中和其他高手一起为无上的冠军荣誉努力比较快乐，或是到一支正在沉沦 的球队当山大王比较爽快。这不是说他是个坏人，只是稍微幻想一下，他就像球场上的 David Caruso(CSI:Miami中的警探)：一个直到失去才懂得珍惜的人。 And yeah, I know he's talented, and the stat geeks love him, even though he peaked as an impact player two seasons ago and has a nasty habit of disappearing in big games. But here's the smoking-gun question: When Marion was sent from the best team in the West to the worst team in the East, was he bummed? Was he furious about losing out on a potential ring? Was he depressed about being banished to hoops hell? No, no and no. By all accounts, he was excited to be making a fresh start. 还有，是的，我知道他很有天份，而且是数据魔人的最爱，尽管他在两年前达到巅峰 ，成为一个有影响力的球员，但还是有一个致命的缺点，总会在关键比赛中自动隐形。但 这点是证据确凿：当Matrix从西区最佳球队被送至东区最差球队，他是否因此垂头丧气？ 他是否对於可能失去一枚总冠军戒而大发雷霆？他是否对於被流放到连季後赛都摸不着边 的大烂队而伤心难过？不，不，不。据说，他对於能有一个全新的开始感到相当兴奋。 And the Suns are supposed to miss him? Huh? Now factor in these four points: 而有人预测说太阳一定会想念他？蛤？你先看过以下四点再决定要不要这样想吧： 1. Shaq played on one-dimensional teams with subpar supporting casts for the past seven seasons; during much of that time (2005 and 2006 excepted), he uneasily coexisted with spectacular scorers who did their best work while everyone else stood around and watched. I know Shaq has looked terrible this year, but you know what? Vintage Kareem would have looked just as bad watching D-Wade go one-on-three on a cancer-ridden team. The Suns didn't trade for Shaq as much as they rescued him. If anything can rejuvenate him, that will. 一、过去七个球季大欧都在打法一成不变，而且队友无法提供有力支援的球队中打球 ；其中大部分的时间('05和'06年除外)，他没办法和超级得分好手合作愉快，因为那类型 的球员只有在每个队友呆若木鸡站在一旁看他个人秀时才能将得分本领发挥到极致。我知 道大欧今年表现看起来很鸟，不过你懂什麽？就算是老前辈天钩贾霸重现江湖，待在一支 已经病入膏肓，只能清开空间看D-Wade一打三的球队，看起来也不会比大欧厉害多少。与 其说太阳是为了补强而把大欧交易，还不如说是把他从地狱拯救过来。 2. Shaq hasn't played with a high-quality point guard … (wait for it) … (I'm serious) … ever! Not once! Everyone knows that Magic extended Kareem's career. You mean to say Nash couldn't make life similarly easy for Shaq? He couldn't draw Shaq's guy away from him, then find the big man for layups and dunks? Shaq wouldn't run the floor if he knew he was getting the ball? Why is Kenny Smith the only one pointing out that it's easier for an aging big guy to run the floor than to battle in a bruising half-court game? 二、大欧还没有和顶尖控卫合作的经验...(等等)...(我是认真的)...从来没有！连一 次都没有！每个人都知道魔术延长了贾霸的职业生涯。你的意思是说Nash没有类似魔术那 种可以让大欧轻松打球的威能？他没办法在吸引防守大欧的球员後找到空档将球传给大个 子轻松上篮或灌篮？如果大欧知道自己会拿到球，他不会愿意满场跑吗？为什麽只有Kenny Smith曾经指出，对於一个逐渐老化的大个子来说，满场跑的开放式打法会比真枪实弹的半 场阵地战还轻松？ 3. The difference between Nicholson in The Departed and Shaq in Phoenix is simple: Jack's performance failed because Jack thought it was good. He believed all the mugging and over-the-top theatrics were a good idea, and nobody told him differently because he's Jack. Had he approached the job like Shaq is approaching his Phoenix stint—humbled and inspired, with something to prove— he might have submitted a classic performance. The Suns medical staff has had enormous success perking up the careers of Nash and Grant Hill, two other talents who had been struggling to play with banged-up bodies. They just might be able to cajole a comeback from a motivated Diesel. It's not unrealistic, right? 三、Nicholson在神鬼无间和大欧加盟凤凰城之间的不同处是显而易见的：Jack表现不 佳是因为他认为那部片很棒。他相信那些夸张至极的打斗和枪战场面就足以吸引人，但没 有人告诉他这想法是有问题的，就只因为他是Jack。若是他演出时的态度能像大欧对待他 在凤凰城这一段不会太长的时间一样 - 谦虚而有活力，并且希望证明一些事情 - 他或许 就能有一次经典的完美演出。太阳医疗团队已经在挽救Nash和Hill职业生涯时获致惊人的 成功，这两位才华洋溢的球员曾经因为饱受伤病困扰而无法发挥百分之百的实力打球。他 们或许能从受到激励的大欧身上获得庞大的挹注。这并不是不切实际，对吧？ 4. The financial issues of this trade have been overblown. Shaq makes less money than Marion and Marcus Banks will in 2008 and 2009. As for the $20 million owed him in 2010, there is always a market for expiring contracts, as the Lakers recently proved by dealing Kwame Brown's corpse for Pau Gasol. 四、关於交易可能造成团队薪资爆表的说法是言过其实了。大欧在'08和'09年球季的 薪水比Matrix和Marcus Banks的薪水加起来少。就算他在'10年的薪水高达2,000万美元也 不需要太担心，市场上总有人愿意接收即将到期的合约，铁证如山，君不见湖人最近用 Kwame Brown的屍体换来了明星大前锋Pau Gasol。 Really, I see no downside for Phoenix other than the 50% chance that Shaq is more washed-up than Katie Couric. But as we learned in No Country for Old Men, life is a series of coin flips. Sometimes you get heads; other times, tails. But you need to flip the coin to find out. After the NBA suits seemed to agree to keep things as safe and predictable as possible, Steve Kerr said, "Screw it, I'm calling heads" and went Anton Chigurh on us. 真的，我看不出来大欧会比哥伦比亚广播公司(CBS)以年薪1,500万美元重金自国家广 播公司(NBC)挖来的晚间新闻女主播Katie Couric还要不济，凤凰城这笔交易不会有超过50 %的失败可能性。但就像我们从险路勿近(2007)中习得的教训，生命中我们时常要面对丢铜 板决定事情的情况。有时候你会丢出正面；其他时候，会丢出反面。但你必须把铜板丢出 去，才会知道自己丢出哪一面。在NBA制服组似乎同意一动不如一静以及尽可能让所有事情 都在掌控之内的情况下，Steve Kerr说，"丢吧，我猜正面。"，他用影片中冷血杀手Anton Chigurh的方式来对待我们。 Kerr got crushed for the trade because nobody would have blamed him for standing pat. Yup, that's the league we love, a league in which you're better off doing nothing than something. I hated this and said as much in that dot-com column. It means that even if I didn't agree with the trade, I'd have to support it, ignoring my memories of Shaq plodding up and down the floor in Miami like a mummy and placing my faith in Phoenix's crack medical staff, a group of people I've never even met. Kerr因为做了这笔交易案而被骂得狗血淋头，因为没有人会因为他选择不交易而责怪 他。对啊，这是我们深爱的联盟，一个认为多做多错，不如不做不错的联盟。我痛恨这样 的想法，而且在网路专栏上面已经写了太多太多了。意思是说就算我不同意这笔交易，我 也会支持它。我会忘掉大欧在迈阿密球场上如同木乃伊一般缓慢移动的记忆，并相信凤凰 城医疗团队妙手回春的功夫，虽然这群人我素未谋面。 But I'm not crazy. The Suns didn't have a chance of winning a title two weeks ago. Now? They're an intriguing choice. And they definitely have a higher ceiling. They have upside. Isn't the definition of a good deal one that betters the state you're in? If the basketball gods exist, Shaq will find the fountain of youth in the desert instead of a fountain of gravy. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. I really am. 我不是疯了。太阳在两个礼拜前没有赢得总冠军的机会。现在？他们或许是总冠军的 强力候选人。而他们肯定会有更好的表现。他们拥有这样的潜力。好交易的其中一个定义 不正是能使球队更有竞争力吗？如果篮球之神确实存在，大欧将会在沙漠中找到能够恢复 青春的年轻之泉，而不是让人肥胖的肉汁之泉。我会一直为他祈祷。我真的会(为他祈祷) 。 Regardless, it's probably a good idea for Kerr to switch from briefs to boxers. Those giant cojones could use the extra room. 不管怎样，对Kerr来说，从紧紧的小三角裤换成宽大的四角内裤，让那些巨大的睾丸 能有更多的活动空间或许是个好主意吧。(应该是说既然有这麽大的胆子，那就赌一把大的 吧。) --

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