This d**k looks like a chick I’VE discovered an early 40th birthday present winging its way to NOEL GALLAGHER. This terrifying picture of comic RUSSELL BRAND in a bikini and Hawaiian garland is being sent to the legend’s mobile as we speak. Noel is a big fan of Russell’s Radio 2 show and during a recent phone-in jokingly declared his love for the loudmouth. Now Russ – in Hawaii filming the St Trinian’s remake – is having a belly laugh of his own by scrawling on his tum: “Noel, I love you too.” The tiny cossie shows off fake love bites and an Ecstasy tattoo. Russ is so proud of his Bizarre Shagger Of The Year 2006 title that he joked to me: “Now I’ve triumphed in the heterosexual division it’s time to focus on the gay league. Winning that is all that could top Hammers’ escape from Premiership relegation. “Noel is the perfect scalp to get me started then I’ll turn to LIAM.” Good luck, Russ, but I hope Noel doesn’t now raid the knickers drawer of his lovely girlfriend SARA MacDONALD. Over to you, Noel. The Sun http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,4-2007220383,00.html --

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