I am not sure if I have MDD( Major Depressive Disorder). I really doubt myself because I really don't think so.What's more, I can't accept the fact I have the problem. Why? Why me have this problem? Sometimes I fall into depression and keep thinking something nagative, such as family, boyfriend or job, and I feel so sad and burst into tears and cannot help it. Actually, I can't find a bosom friend to share these things. It's difficult to tell all what I think to other people because I really care what others see me as. To be honest, I have no friend, and even my mother died when I was 14. Everytime, I feel someone's comfort is just comparing the worse and so what? They don't really help. They even don't care. Sometimes, I would really have some thoughts so wild and nagative. I just can't be so passionate to others, and it seems everything starts to go to hell. Last year, I went to see a psychiatrist and was diagnosed as MDD, but I don't believe it, not mentioning to have the medicine. Maybe it's why I think I have problem now. I have to overcome it no matter what. Try to control my emotion is just the first step, but still so hard. My personality is easily pissed off but often not visible from my appearance. It's a little bit late, so let's write down a period. Good night~ --

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