已得原作者同意 作者: tyui0459 (TYUI) 看板: APH 标题: Fw: [翻译] Polish Jokes 波兰笑话集 (1) 时间: Wed Jun 5 02:16:07 2013 ※ [本文转录自 joke 看板 #1HhUeB2u ] 作者: belleaya (台中李奥纳多皮卡丘) 看板: joke 标题: [翻译] Polish Jokes 波兰笑话集 (1) 时间: Tue Jun 4 21:22:16 2013 (含单字补充好读版 http://belleaya.pixnet.net/blog/post/32209779 ) Q: Did you hear about the Polak who thought his wife was trying to kill him? A: On her dressing table he found a bottle of "Polish Remover". Q:你有听波拉克说他老婆想杀他吗？ A:嗯，他发现在她桌上有一瓶去光水。(Polish remover，也可当波兰移除者) Q: How do you sink a polish battleship? A: Put it in water. Q:你如何让一艘波兰战舰沉船？ A:让船下水就可以了。 Q: What happened to the Polish hockey team? A: They all drowned in spring training. Q:波兰的冰上曲棍球队怎麽了？ A:他们春训的时候淹死了。(春天冰融化了) Q: Whats the difference between a smart Polak and a unicorn? A: Nothing, they're both fictional characters Q:一个聪明的波兰人和一只独角兽有什麽不同？ A:没有不同，都是神话生物。 Q: Why wasn't Christ born in Poland? A: Because they couldn't find three wisemen and a virgin. Q:为什麽耶稣不是出生在波兰？ A:因为在波兰找不到三个智者和一个处女。 Q: How do you tell which is the Groom at a Polish wedding? A: He's the one with the CLEAN bowling shirt. Q:怎麽知道波兰婚礼中谁是新郎？ A:找穿着洁白的保龄球衫的就是了。 Q: How do you stop a Polish army on horseback? A: Turn off the carousel. Q:如何让马背上的波兰军停下来？ A:把旋转木马电源关掉。 Q: What does a polish girl do after she sucks cock? A: Spits out the feathers. Q:一个波兰女孩在吸完鸡鸡之後会做什麽？ A:吐掉羽毛。 Q: How do you know if you're in front of a Polish firing squad? A: They are standing in a circle. Q:要怎麽知道你站在波兰的行刑队前？ A:他们会围成一圈。(开枪时除了犯人也会射到对面的自己人) Q: What do you do if a Polak throws a pin at you? A: Run like hell - he's still got a hand-grenade between his teeth. Q:如果一个波兰人朝着你丢保险插梢该怎麽办？ A:快跑！ 因为那波兰人嘴巴还咬着手榴弹！ Q: What do you do if a Polak throws a hand-grenade at you? A: Take the pin out and throw it back. Q:如果一个波兰人朝你丢手榴弹怎麽办？ A:把插梢拔出来，丢回去。 Q: How do you take census in a Polish village? A: Roll a quarter down the street, count the legs, divide by two, and subtract one for the Jew who catches it. Q:如何在波兰小村子里人口普查？ A:丢个铜板在地上，然後算有多少只脚除以二，然後减一，因为捡到钱的是犹太人。 Q: Who wears a forest ranger's hat and carries a can of kerosene? A: Stanislaus the Fire Prevention Bear of the Polish National Forest Service. Q:在波兰谁会戴着森林管理员的帽子然後拿着煤油灯？ A:波兰国家森林管理处的防火熊。 Q: How did the Polish mother teach her son which way to put his underwear on? A: Yellow in the front, Brown in the back! Q:波兰人的妈妈怎麽教孩子穿内裤？ A:把黄色穿在前面，咖啡色穿後面。 Q: How do you know you're flying over Poland? A: Toilet paper hanging on the clotheslines. Q:如何知道你正在波兰上空？ A:看到晒衣绳上晒着厕纸就是了。 Q: Why do Polish names end in "ski" ? A: Because they can't spell tobbagan. Q:为什麽波兰人名字後面常会加"ski"(滑雪板)？ A:因为他们不会拼"tobbagan"(雪橇)。 Q: Do you know why the new football stadium they built in Warsaw could not be used? A: No matter where you sat you were behind a Pole. Q:你知道华沙新盖的足球场为什麽没办法启用吗？ A:因为不管你坐哪个位置都会被柱子挡到。 Q: Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? A: The pilot got cold, so he turned off the fan. Q:你知道波兰有一架直昇机坠毁吗？ A:嗯，那个驾驶觉得冷所以把电风扇(螺旋桨)关掉。 Q: Did you know that Russia just bought 12,000 Septic Tanks? A: As soon as they learn how to drive 'em, they are going to invade Poland. Q:你知道俄国刚购入12,000辆水肥车吗？ A:嗯啊，他们打算学会怎麽开之後就去进攻波兰。 Q: What's the motto of the Poland? A: Every man for himself. Q:波兰人的座右铭是什麽？ A:自求多福。 Q: Why are there no ice cubes in Poland? A: They forgot the recipe. Q:为什麽在波兰没有冰块？ A:因为波兰人忘记做冰块的食谱了。 Q: What happens when a Polak doesn't pay his garbage bill? A: They stop delivering. Q:一个波兰人如果不交垃圾的帐单会怎样？ A:垃圾车就不会把垃圾送给他们。 Q: How do you ruin a Polish party? A: Flush the punch bowl. Q:如何破坏一个波兰人的派对？ A:冲马桶。 (这个中文有点难翻，flush是冲马桶，punch bowl是调酒，意指他们喝屎尿当调酒) Q: What is long and hard that a Polish bride gets on her wedding night? A: A new last name. Q:一个波兰新娘婚後会得到什麽又长、又硬(又难)的东西？ A:夫姓。 Q: Why did the Polish couple decide to have only 4 children? A: They'd read in the newspaper that one out of every five babies born in the world today is Hindu. Q:为什麽波兰的夫妻决定只生四个孩子？ A:因为他们读报纸说每五个新生儿，就有一个是印度人。 Q: What did the Polish mother say when her daughter announced that she was pregnant? A: "Are you sure it's yours?" Q:当一个波兰少女怀孕，她妈妈会怎麽说？ A:"你确定孩子是你的吗？" Q: Why did the Polak sell his water skis? A: He couldn't find a lake with a hill in it. Q:为什麽那波兰人要卖掉他的冲浪板？ A:因为他找不到湖面是斜的湖。 Q: Did you hear about the Polish family that froze to death outside a theater? A: They were waiting to see the movie "Closed for the Winter." Q:你有听说波兰有一家子冻死在戏院外吗？ A:嗯啊，他们是在外头等着进场看一部电影「冬天本戏院暂不开放」。 ---- (英文原文资料来源： http://tinyurl.com/d4cp3wu ) ---- 抱怨一下......痞客邦现在竟然会强制加广告 虽说是可以用一些招式让广告不要出现在很丑的地方...... 要出现广告是ok毕竟用免钱的也怪不了人家 但是广告也太丑了吧!!! 相比之下日本geocities的广告就做得蛮美观的 -- ●` ˊ● ▲ ● ▲ Belleaya 极短篇小说创作 ㄟ_▲_ㄏ www.facebook.com/belleaya.pixnet.net belleaya ▲▊ http://www.facebook.com/belleaya.pixnet.net ▲ http://www.facebook.com/belleaya.pixnet.net ▲ ▼ --

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※ 发信站: 批踢踢实业坊(ptt.cc) ※ 转录者: tyui0459 (111.255.105.171), 时间: 06/05/2013 02:16:07 ※ 编辑: tyui0459 来自: 111.255.105.171 (06/05 02:16)